“A Chasing After the Wind” Kind of Day…

There are many changes in life that we all face. Many of these are often beyond our control. For instance, many of us have changed jobs. All of us have experienced loss in one form or another. These losses bring about change. Some of us have experienced the loss of a loved one. There are others who have lost faith in someone that they have trusted. Sometimes change can be a good thing and other times it can be something that is very hard to accept. I don’t always adapt to change very well. In fact, I often find it to be very frustrating. However, if there is one thing that I have learned in life, things are always changing.

Here in Illinois the leaves on the trees have changed color. Many of them are also beginning to fall to the ground. Autumn is upon us and there is a chill in the air. In a few months there will be snow on the ground and the winds will be howling. Icicles will be hanging from the gutters.

I am often struck with how quickly time passes. Just yesterday it seems like I was a boy without a care in the world. However, I am now 42 years old and often feel overwhelmed with the responsibilities of adulthood. Although, I have far fewer concerns than most, I am sure. Despite this, autumn is a time of year that I get kind of melancholy. I am not sure if it is because the days become shorter, and life just often feels cold. My moods tend to get darker at times throughout this part of the year. Life can seem pointless at times. However, I have faith that it is not. I believe there is something better waiting for me after this life passes.

In spite of my faith, life is still difficult. There are good days and bad days. Fortunately, the good days usually outweigh the bad. During the difficult times, I would just like to bury my head in the sand and wait for better days to arrive. However, that is not possible. We all have to take the good with the bad. I know seeing the bad often helps me appreciate all of the good things in life.

Living life with a disability is a struggle. Living with depression and anxiety, as I do, can magnify those feelings. It is hard to beat back the blues when they arrive. Lately, life has seemed cold, and that is not just because we haven’t had the heat on in the house! It is a time where life has seemed meaningless. When my mind wanders to such thoughts, I recall the words of King Solomon in Ecclesiastes 1:14. In this biblical passage Solomon expresses his thoughts on life by saying: “I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless, a chasing after the wind.” He is right, all things “under the sun” are meaningless. That is, they are meaningless without a Godly perspective. This is a perspective on which I often lose focus. That is when the dark days are their darkest. I pray that I never lose focus on the point that God is no longer present, for He is what brings true meaning to everything that we do “under the sun” and beyond.

Published by rtb77

I am a 43 year old male who was born with spina bifida and hydrocephalus. I have been married to my incredible wife Amanda for 7 years. We live in Illinois and both work in government jobs. I enjoy reading, writing, and watching Chicago Cubs baseball. I also enjoy the absurdity that daily life often brings, especially to those with disabilities. I try to see the humor in these situations. If you are offended by the use of the word “crippled” in the title of this blog please read the first post. I don’t like the word crippled and have never considered myself as such. Furthermore, I have never wanted to stand out from others. However, my intent is to show how humor has helped me deal with the hardship of disability. Likewise, I want to show others how full a life one can lead, even if you happen to be disabled. The use of the word “crippled” for the title is meant to be a bit of irony.

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